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Some of these vehicles just don’t belong. (http://www.cleanmpg.com/forums/articles/t-turkeys-the-automotive-variety-of-the-year-nominations-7398.html)

http://www.cleanmpg.com/photos/data/501/Hummer_H21.jpgWayne Gerdes - CleanMPG (www.cleanmpg.com) - Nov. 22, 2007

While most are busy readying or are now consuming their feasts of turkey, mash potatoes and gravy, stuffing and pumpkin pie, there is another type of turkey that sticks out like a sore thumb and it is definitely not the eating variety. For those that have one of these in the garage, all any of us can do is shake our heads in disbelief.

This list does not include the super-exotics as there are so few and are in such limited production, they are all but museum pieces. The vehicles listed below are those that cause the most harm with minimal if no actual benefit other than to say mine is bigger than yours. Simply stated, this is where insanity meets the road.

While building the list currently being sold and driven in North America, the selection criterion was simple: New automobiles that achieve pitifully low fuel economy yet are still somewhat affordable and that many outside the community consider standard fare.

Without further ado, let me be the first to announce, CleanMPG’s first annual Thanksgivings Day Turkeys with all the fixings.

Compact P/Us

2008 Ford Ranger and Mazda B4000 4.0L w/ AT and 4WD – Fortunately or unfortunately depending on which side of the windscreen you happen to be on, we have the 4.0L equipped Ford and Mazda small P/U’s receiving an unbelievably low 15 mpg combined. Given the same vehicles equipped with the 2.3L ICE, a MT and in a 2WD configuration are rated as the most fuel efficient P/U’s sold in America, it should surprise many that this vehicle is both Mr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde all from the same assembly line. Is it also any wonder why rumors continue to swirl that the 2008 MY will be its last?

Dishonorable mentions in the category include those receiving the same 15 mpg combined, the Chevrolet Colorado and GMC Canyon with the Nissan Frontier and Toyota Tacoma both achieving 16 mpg combined.

Standard P/Us

2008 Dodge Ram 4.7L w/ 6-speed MT and 4WD – Given the appalling fuel economy this monster receives, I doubt its owners feel it is Thanksgiving but more like Halloween! Achieving just 12 city and 16 highway for a 14 mpg combined rating, I am sure it makes its owners feel proud filling up day after day after day. While on E85, the numbers are an even more laughable 10 mpg combined.

Dishonorable mentions in this category with combined EPA ratings of 14 mpg include the Lincoln Mark LT, a whole slew of various equipped Nissan Titans, GMC Sierras and low and behold, the recently redesigned Toyota Tundra 4.7L V8 receiving a 15 mpg combined rating.

SUVs

2008 Jeep Grand Cherokee 6.1L w/ AT and 4WD – The list of FSPs (Fuel Sucking Pigs) in this category is so numerous I am not doing the short list justice by labeling the Jeep number 1. With a 12 mpg combined rating, is it any wonder why the world is the way it is today?

Dishonorable mentions in this category include the Mercedes Benz G500 and SAAB 9-7X, both with a 13 mpg combined and the Chevrolet Trailblazer in both the 2WD and 4WD configurations at 13 and 14 mpg combined respectively.

Gas Guzzling Turkeys in the flesh

Class|Make|Model|Cylinders|ICE Size|Drive Configuration|Transmission|FE City (mpg)|FE Highway (mpg)|FE Combined (mpg)
|||||||||
Small P/Us|Mazda|B4000|6|4.0L|4WD|AT|14|17|15
"|Ford|Ranger|6|4.0L|4WD|AT|14|17|15
"|Chevrolet|Colorado|5|3.7L|2WD|AT|14|18|15
"|GMC|Canyon|5|3.7L|2WD|AT|14|18|15
"|Nissan|Frontier|6|4.0L|4WD|AT|14|19|16
"|Toyota|Tacoma|6|4.0L|4WD|MT|15|18|16
|||||||||
Standard P/Us|Dodge|Ram|8|4.7L|4WD|MT|12|16|14
"|Lincoln|Mark LT|8|5.4L|4WD|AT|12|16|14
"|Nissan|Titan|8|5.6L|4WD|AT|12|17|14
"|Nissan|Titan|8|5.6L|2WD|AT|12|17|14
"|GMC|Sierra|8|6.2L|4WD|AT|12|18|14
"|GMC|Sierra|8|6.2L|2WD|AT|12|19|15
"|Toyota|Tundra|8|4.7L|4WD|AT|13|16|15
|||||||||
SUVs|Jeep|Grand Cherokee|8|6.1L|4WD|AT|11|14|12
"|Mercedes Benz|G500|8|5.0L|4WD|AT|12|15|13
"|Saab|9-7X|8|6.0L|4WD|AT|12|16|13
"|Chevrolet|Trailblazer|8|6.0L|4WD|AT|12|16|13
"|Chevrolet|Trailblazer|8|6.0L|2WD|AT|12|16|14
"|GMC|Yukon|8|6.0L|4WD|AT|12|17|14
"|Chevrolet|Suburban|8|6.0L|4WD|AT|12|17|14
"|Chevrolet|Avalanche|8|6.0L|4WD|AT|12|17|14

Along with the Turkeys above, we have vehicles with a GVWR over 8,000 pounds that do not need to be EPA rated due to loopholes in the current laws. These include the 2008 Ford Expedition XL and some Mercury Navigators, all Ford Super Duties, GM Hummer H2 and Silverado HD P/Us and both ¾ and 1 ton Dodge Rams.

Today, most drivers head out and come home from wherever with a single driver 90% of the time. With the single occupant driver in mind, is there any reason why the compiled list above appears so laughable? Add to the prodigious consumption these beasts are responsible for, they surely provide yuletide cheer to those supplying the fuel to keep them running year round.

Its amazing to me that loopholes exist in the current EPA rating system. The biggest gas sucking pigs that are driven on the road as DD are exempt from ratings and subsequent CAFE standards?

Sigh..... Change needs to happen

http://www.cleanmpg.com/photos/data/500/likenothingelse2.gif

ROTFL.... Nice... :)

I had a huge vehicle tailgating me a couple of days ago. All I could recognize was a big "Nissan" emblem entirely too close, and easily readable. I managed to get the tailgater around me by slowing down in a passing zone. It was a Nissan Titan pickup truck being driven aggressively (and irresponsibly) by a woman driver. I was in a Honda Civic GX, and didn't appreciate my risks being increased by a woman with too much testosterone in her bloodstream. I was traveling using no gasoline and putting out minimal emissions, while some numbskull was ramming and jamming in a FSP. "Fuel-sucking-pig:" I like that, it fits perfectly.

Harry

Loved the writeup, but, um, shouldn't "honorable mention" be "dishonorable mention"?

I thought I would share a "funny" little story about a guy at work who was having problems with his truck...

Mr. X was scoping out his deer hunting grounds a few weeks ago in his 1997 GMC 4X4 with a 5.7 liter engine, using 4 wheel drive. After perusing the Northwoods, Mr. X dropped the truck's gearbox back into 2 wheel drive to go home, whereupon an hellacious grinding noise came from the depths of said gearbox.

Multiple tries at engaging/disengaging gearbox did not improve the matter, and Mr. X was forced to drive home in the offending vehicle.

The following week Mr. X stopped by work on his way into the dealership's repair department. In a last ditch effort to try and save Mr. X some money, I volunteered to crawl under the truck to ensure the gearbox linkage was fully engaging (it was). Mr. X left work intending to get an estimate for repair of his 4X4 truck.

Approximately 1 hour later, I received an email from Mr. X with the repair estimate of $500 to replace the transfer gearbox and asking me for my opinion. I responded that $500 is 1 car payment and I would not hesitate to get it repaired (This truck had less than 100,000 miles, no rust, etc.)

Mr. X does not respond until the next day, where he informs me he traded the truck in on a new truck that has an 8.1 liter gas engine. I choked on my coffee, and stood in silence. Mr. X informs me that his 7 year old daughter doesn't like the truck because it's too slow (he watches the instant economy indicator, and doesn't like to see it dip to 1 or 2 mpg).

Wednesday night, as I was leaving work, a co-worker called Mr. X who has been off deer hunting all week. I happened to walk into the room just as the co-worker asks, "Well are you pulling anything? How fast are you driving it?" I knew it was Mr. X on the other end of the line.

I'm sure there is some human psychological reason for buying a big truck with a big engine, and then being shocked by how much gasoline it consumes. I guess I'm not qualified to diagnose his condition. :rolleyes:

I thought I would share a "funny" little story about a guy at work who was having problems with his truck...

Mr. X does not respond until the next day, where he informs me he traded the truck in on a new truck that has an 8.1 liter gas engine. I choked on my coffee, and stood in silence. Mr. X informs me that his 7 year old daughter doesn't like the truck because it's too slow (he watches the instant economy indicator, and doesn't like to see it dip to 1 or 2 mpg).

I'm sure there is some human psychological reason for buying a big truck with a big engine, and then being shocked by how much gasoline it consumes. I guess I'm not qualified to diagnose his condition. :rolleyes:

this guy has more problems than we can ever conquer here if he determines he needs a bigger car because his SEVEN YEAR OLD thinks it's too slow......i can't begin to list the parts of that statement that feel so wrong.

More about "Mr X"....he is probably the one that is tailgating you - even when there are lanes open to the left of you, but not at that nanosecond. I must have crossed with Mr X many times on forums as it infurates him when it's suggested he "needs" a bloated set of wheels to express his power and worth.