Tony and Priapus

Discussion in 'My Ride' started by TonyPSchaefer, Dec 31, 2006.

  1. TonyPSchaefer

    TonyPSchaefer Well-Known Member

    My Ride.

    [xfloat=left][/xfloat]Tony Pschaefer - Dec. 31, 2006

    When I presented Priapus the opportunity to meet everyone here at CleanMPG, he was truly excited. However, his tires are way too large for the little keys on the keyboard and my wife won't allow him in the house. Therefore, he asked his little brother, Priapite, to be in the photo and I will type what he dictates. Since he can't read, he has to take my word for it.

    Hello, my name is Priapus and I am a 2004 Package #9 Toyota Prius. Right now, I have 27,200 miles and a lifetime average of 50.5 MPG. I know the EPA estimated that I should be averaging 55MPG, but I feel that with the cold winters here in Chicagoland, I'm doing pretty good.

    Tony can drive a little heavy-footed at times, but for the most part, he tends to go easy on me, coasting and gliding whenever he can (I love gliding; it's so freeing). For this reason, I achieved six straight tanks averaging 60+ MPG in the past summer. Because Tony didn't over-inflate my tires until mid-summer, I feel that I will do better next summer starting earlier in the season.

    Last year, I saw some of my friends at Hybridfest. It was like the other meet-ups I and the other hybrids go to only it was bigger. I saw more Insights than I'd ever seen in one place. When I grow up, I want to be a Hybrid Lexus like the one I saw Eric driving.

    This guy named Wayne with a red Prius installed my EV switch with the help of a really nice girl named Amy. Tony missed part of it but we won't go into that.

    Right now, my grill is blocked with insulation. This keeps my engine from cooling down as quickly in the bitter-cold winter. Even after only a couple tanks, I can really tell a difference. My lowest of all low tank averages is 40.4 MPG when the average temperature was 19ºF. I'm not one for speculating, but I think I should be able to make it through the winter in the high 40s. Coupling that with better summer mileage should take my lifetime average above 51 or even 52.

    Here's a chart of my lifetime mileage:

    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 31, 2006
  2. diamondlarry

    diamondlarry Super MPG Man/god :D

    Hello Priapus. It's good to see you again! You too Tony. ;) I see from your figures that you have been performing well for Tony given what he puts you through. I hope that in the future that if he tends to be a bit rough on you that you will find it in your heart to forgive him and reward him with good mileage anyway. Good luck and happy motoring Priapus. Take care of the big guy Tony.
  3. xcel

    xcel PZEV, there's nothing like it :) Staff Member

    Hi Tony:

    ___I think you might want to take a quick look at the home page today. Although a little early, let us just call it a New Years Eve present :D Yet another great write-up as well!

    ___I cannot wait until Priapus tells us all about his drives with 50 + in his shoes this coming spring too …

    ___Finally, I hope you did not mind me changing the format a tad. You can see the additional code by hitting the edit button.

    ___Good Luck

    Last edited: Jan 1, 2007
  4. TonyPSchaefer

    TonyPSchaefer Well-Known Member

    "HIS", Wayne. Priapus is a he.
    One thing he didn't mention - because I haven't yet told him - is that he's named for the Greek god of male fertility. In Greek mythology, he's identifiable be the size of his phallus. Do a Google-Image search for "Priapus" and you'll never confuse his gender again. :)

    Thanks for the reformatting. I couldn't figure out how to make the text and picture float and wrap.
  5. Chuck

    Chuck just the messenger

    Remember an episode of All in the Family in the early 70's when Archie Bunker stated "she" described ships....and hurricanes. :eek:

    Great story Tony, but I'm not done commenting. :)
  6. diamondlarry

    diamondlarry Super MPG Man/god :D

  7. Chuck

    Chuck just the messenger


    Now that I know the story of Priapus, could Smiling Bob help? :D

    I had Smiling Bob as an avitar for quite awile, as I drive a "Honda Enzyte". ;)

    If you have not seen his commercials, this is a sample > *Smiling Bob's Health Video (Funny)
  8. xcel

    xcel PZEV, there's nothing like it :) Staff Member

    Hi Tony:

    ___Whoops, fixed that little gender problem ;)

    ___Great pic too! Did your wife take that one?

    ___Good Luck

  9. TonyPSchaefer

    TonyPSchaefer Well-Known Member

    Larry, I remember trying to explain the story of Priapus as delicately as possible in the car with your son. If I remember correctly, I failed and it turned into a "guy moment" as we all laughed speculating what kind of car a guy with nothing to compensate for. In fact, that's the day we got passed by a guy in a sporty BMW and I yelled "sorry about your penis." :D

    Delta, I am very familiar with Smiling Bob. He's always so happy (as is his wife).

    Wayne, the picture was done with a timer. I was trying to think of something different. I tried a few different poses working with perspective and ended up liking this one the best.
  10. diamondlarry

    diamondlarry Super MPG Man/god :D

    It's probably not something that he hasn't already heard. It's hard to believe that my son turned 18 on Friday. Maybe he could tell me a few things.:D
  11. Chuck

    Chuck just the messenger

    I hardly understand the lawsuits against Enzyte - anyone seeing the commercials can't take them seriously as they are comically over the top. On another forum, I actually had an employee from Enzyte ask about my Smiling Bob avitar. :D

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